It was his funny stories sat in their living room with my Gramps acting out adventures, making me and my Nanni laugh, that was a key influence in urging me to take up running as a hobby. It wasn’t before long that I became fixated on trying to follow in his footsteps and complete events locally at distances I could never have imagined.

At the turn of 2017 David started describing blurred and colourful vision on waking; his handwriting had deteriorated completely, and at the point where he tried to make himself some beans on toast, by putting the toaster on our lit hob – I knew we were facing into more troubled waters. Invasive surgery, debilitating radio and chemo hadn’t stopped the tumour from growing again.

David was immediately bounced into more chemo and we were put in touch with Rotherham Hospice being given the revised prognosis of ‘think months not years’.

2017 – We were assigned, and felt an immediate connection with Joanne, our specialist nurse. David looked forward to all the home visits, and thoroughly enjoyed spending a day a week out of our usual 4 walls, and attending the Rotherham Hospice Day Ward. By Christmas Dave’s mobility was deteriorating. More pains were becoming evident, and he was clearly withdrawing from socialising with some family and friends.

We entered into 2018 with heavy hearts…

Returning from work one afternoon in January, earlier than planned, I thought to enjoy a cosy winters night in front of the TV – David was clearly unwell, still in bed – and couldn’t string one sentence for me without chasing a breath.

The ambulance crew on this occasion, quickly assessed David, my difficulty in supporting him at home, and instead of taking him to Rotherham Hospital, called the Hospice to see if a bed was available. David was lucid enough to agree that was the best place for him.

During his stay – and as a family unit – we knew again, we were riding into more rough seas ahead, and we were faced with whether we would get him home again, at all. The team taking care of David, I can’t thank highly enough – everyone we came into contact with, were friendly, caring, thoughtful, professional, sensitive and so much more.

Three weeks later, David was discharged for home in time for Valentine’s Day, and on the condition that we had arranged downstairs living for him. This was all arranged with some home care being put into place to support me and the regular nurse visits.

Faye had decided she wanted to marry Joe and christen our first grandson, Parker, creating more memorable days for the family in 2018. A boost in steroids, & a determined family beside him – he walked Faye into the Blacksmiths at Gretna Green to marry the love of her life; and on the Sunday of the same weekend, Parker was christened.

I have no doubt in my mind, David didn’t just see Parker born, he saw Faye & Joe married, Parker Christened, Alex turn 25 AND Parker turn one…as a result of the home care, we had in place, beautifully supported by regular visits from the hospice at home team.

I often ask myself where I gathered the strength, stamina and sometimes stoic quality to smile in the face of adversity and heartbreak….then I looked over my shoulder and felt the love and remote support of a full team of experts.

The hospice at home team worked at what Dave called ‘another level’ above the NHS nurses we experienced; it was like the whole career path and family life I started by describing at the start of my session today, had been quietly gleaned from us over time. Our personalities and needs were matched on every visit.

I could recall the hours, minutes and seconds of the 12th August 2018 – I was worried I wouldn’t know when it would be ‘time’. On reflection I now know that the relationships we have built with the Palliative teams at Rotherham Hospice, educated me brilliantly, prepared me for the worst, and I knew my man mountain better than anyone still.

David passed away exactly where he wanted to be, in his happy place. If there’s only one thing you can give to the love of your life – it’s to deliver the promise that he would be where he wanted to be, with whom he wanted to be with and looking totally gorgeous. Palliative Care throughout, extended to our full family unit – we were beaten and broken, burned out, bone-weary and bedraggled – BUT we have made friends that will remain in our lives; and we have already realised that a service such as the one we benefitted from, isn’t available everywhere, it is a bit of a postcode lottery – but why should that remain so.

Life was anything but boring with Mr C, from meeting and turning my head in 1983, and marrying in 1989 – he kept me on my toes right up until the end of his fight – and in fact, is still now, as we continue in his effort to raise charitable funds for the teams that kept us from falling to our knees.

I wouldn’t have wanted to be in our corner of the universe with anyone else but him. You just never know when tomorrow’s uncertainty might turn the corner to a family’s final answers, and a figurehead, a key stone, a man mountain, is cruelly removed. As your tomorrow starts with full diaries, and patients to see – someone’s world just permanently tilted on its axis….and there you are – always caring.

I have learned so much through living, googling, caring & sleeping with the enemy that was a Brain Tumour invading David. I am changed. I am sleep deprived but I am stronger. I am working out my next move. I am a great believer that I had been placed where I needed to be, and am still, in the meantime I am back at work, being a grandma, a mum, a mother in law, a Head of Marketing – and a chief cook and laundry fairy! Keeping myself busy, AND in training for the Yorkshire 3 Peaks in June!

I have met and cared for so many people over the years who have touched my life and I strongly believe that the end of a person’s life deserves as much beauty, care, and respect as the beginning.

I have a young family and each morning I wake up feeling blessed that I am fit and healthy. I see so many people fighting for that extra time with their loved ones, that’s why I treasure life even more. No one knows what is round the corner.

My children love to get involved too, I think its really important to teach them that charities like ours wouldn’t be able to run if we didn’t fundraise and what a difference our community can make by getting involved.

So that’s why I set myself a challenge one day a month for six months to give a bit back to the Hospice and make a little bit of a difference.

My friends Laura, Liz and Jenny have joined me on this challenge. Jenny is Charity Champion at Morrison’s and she has been awesome, she has organised fundraising days at Morrison’s Parkgate. We have carried out bucket sales and bun sales at my children’s school, we completed a 5hr Spinathon that I roped some more of my great friends into.

Our latest challenge was running the Sheffield Half Marathon in memory of all the people I have cared for and finally our last challenge is a Dirty Rat Race which is a 13.1 mile run through and over 150 obstacles, it’s the toughest obstacle course in the UK. My friends are really wishing they hadn’t agreed to join me on this one.

My aim is to raise a £1,000 in total with the funds being split between our lovely Sun Beams Children Bereavement Support and the ward.

“How the nurses handled the situation was amazing” Shauna says “We wanted to give something back”.

Grace’s Nannan was cared for by the Hospice team who provided care and support so that she could stay at home following a diagnosis of cancer. Through Grace’s work at Rotherham Hospital, she covers Rotherham Hospice as part of her role, and tells us she sees first hand just how important the Hospice is to people in the area:

“My patients always speak so highly of the care they receive and it’s such a nice environment to work in when I visit the inpatient unit and the day hospice.”

Shauna & Grace decided to take on the 3 Peaks after discovering a love of walking, and spent hours training for the day itself.

The challenge is to complete all 3 peaks within 12 hours, and Shauna completed it in 10 hours and 30 minutes. Shauna and Grace set themselves a £500 donation target:

“We didn’t think we’d reach our £500 target.” Shauna says, as she tells me that social media helped to push their fundraising to the next level. “Donations kept coming through on the day”.

Despite the challenging terrain, and all the different varieties of weather they experienced throughout the day, Shauna and Grace raised a fantastic £1,300 and Shauna expresses how much she would recommend to anyone the Yorkshire 3 Peaks Challenge.